The beauty of life is appreciated when people help one
another in every reasonable way, this shows the existence of mutual love, which
should be reciprocated so as to increase the quality of life people live. Life
becomes ugly and tiresome when people fail to help one another or instead abuse
the help they have received from people of goodwill. In this case, the essence
of HELP actions is undermined by abusive reactions.
At times, one might begin to think or wonder why this
phenomenon is more pronounced in this current generation of humans. No one currently wants to indulge in
rendering help to the helpless and needy. A rich man sees a poor man dying in
hunger and turns a blind eye.
Why should such anomaly rear its ugly head and be
more pronounced in this 21st century? At the mention of HELP, people
frown their faces or shy away from it. Help is now seen as a deadly trap.
Although not everyone is evil, wicked, or filled with
ungodly intentions. Still there remains the pertinent question that craves for
an immediate answer. The question is simple and it asks, why do people no
longer render help nor show sympathy to the needy or oppressed? Finding good
Samaritans in our society nowadays is like a wild goose chase, and can be
compared to a camel passing through the eye of a needle.
The answer for the recent helplessness witnessed in our
society today, is as a result of the gross emergence of a phenomena known as
HELP-ABUSE. Help-abuse is a portmanteau or the amalgamation of two distinct
words which are Help and Abuse.
According to the Merriam-Webster’s dictionary, Help means giving assistance or support
to an individual (to make way for relieve in any critical condition witnessed
by an individual). According to the Wikipedia, Abuse means the improper usage or misuse of an entity or something,
to bad effect or for a bad purpose.
In essence, Help-abuse means the improper use, regard,
and reception of assistance received in any form. Help-abuse has rubbished the
impacts of philanthropists in our society. It has made the good eggs among men
to lament to God and soliloquize in agony, in most cases they are filled with
sorrow and soaked in regrets because of the outcome of a help rendered to a
sibling, friend or a stranger.
A young man was recently seen lamenting, and he said -
why is it that the people I have helped in the past, often turn around to stab
me at the back? And we depart as enemies. Does it mean I have been acting
stupidly and foolishly by rendering assistance to my fellow being? God why?
Thus he questions God because he feels that God in his infinite mercies, would
be so gladdened when he renders help to humanity and God will bless him more,
it is true and he has not erred for think as such, but the reverse often becomes
the case as unforeseen catastrophes emerge from a help rendered with a clear
conscience.
This shows that man as an entity is totally unpredictable,
and have atoms of ungratefulness lingering in his being, and he is actually waiting
for the right time to manifest it. Because of help-abuse, innocent people who
really need help cannot have access to it. As a result of the attitudes of
people who have crossed the path of the helper in the years past.
A woman who owned a restaurant at Ebonyi state was seen
harassing corps members who were serving in her land and were in dire need of
food to eat.
What is the problem? She said, and I quote:
“People are unappreciative, past corps members who ate in
my shop during their one year service, failed to pay me my money and I was at
loss, God will punish them. I was so foolish to have accepted their lie, which
was that they will eat and pay immediately the monthly allowance is paid to
them, and not only that. The male corps members when accepted into the
community and welcomed into various clans and families, tend to champion the
cause of impregnating our young girls and then run away at the end of service
year.”
Is this behavior good? She asked me. It’s not good, I
replied.
If people do not abuse help, probably there will be more
philanthropists around. People who are willing to stop, and ask what is
happening, and then proceed to proffer helpful solutions, won’t be a rare breed.
A young man was lamenting on how he offered help to a
stranger by giving him a ride on his motorcycle, but along the way, the
stranger contacted his gang and they robbed him and took his motorcycle away. So
many people have met their untimely death as a result of helping someone. But
is that what it should be? Should Help as a concept, be tagged with evil?
Miss Chioma a young landlady was overheard saying, “I
wasn’t hardhearted before, I used to help anyone in need, but today people say
am wicked, but I don’t care because my past experiences with helping people
have thought me a lot. I now mind my business 24/7, let the dead bury the dead!”
Some of the few causes of Help-abuse includes: Lack of
Fear of God in people, Hatred, Dead Conscience, Greed/ envy/ Jealousy, Ungratefulness,
Callousness etc.
We can go on and on to recount peoples sad experiences,
even I the writer have borne the brunt of ungratefulness from friends assumed
to be trustworthy. But we must not let that stop us from doing well. We must always
remember that the only legacy we leave behind is not how much money we have,
how many houses we built nor how many cars we ride, but how many lives we
touched.
No matter how badly aircrafts crash today, people will
still engage in air transportation tomorrow. No matter how bad people abuse
your help, it should not stop you from rendering help. You never know what God
has in stock for you, rather do you know the next shoulder you might be forced
to lean on, since a tree does not make a forest or jungle.
Mathew
25: 34 – 40
Then the
king will say to those at his right hand, ‘come you that are blessed by my
Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world.
For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave something to
drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me. I was naked and you gave me
clothing, I was sick and you took care of me, I was in prison and you visited
me.
Then the
righteous will ask him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or
thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you as a stranger and
invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or
in prison and go to visit you?
The king
will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these
brothers and sisters of mine (Brethren), you did it for me.’
People should not expect much, when they help others. Because
when you expect much, you can easily be disappointed and then the thought of
help-abuse comes to mind. Help because you want to help, and not because you
want something in return for the help you rendered. When you render help and
demand for something in return, then there is no help rendered. Such can be
termed to be a transaction between a seller and a buyer in a market scene.
The only way to minimize the risk of exposure to
help-abuse is by being vigilant enough to know who you are helping. In cases
where by you have the opportunity to have a closer look at who came for help,
maybe he/she is a friend or sibling, it’s advised to evaluate the individual in
question and estimate how trustworthy or God-fearing he/she is. Do not waste
your resources on people who you know will clearly abuse your help and do not
judge people, neither do you categorize everyone as being the same, without
evaluating the personalities involved.
Helping strangers is not bad, but helping them is often strange.
You must be in good relationship with your creator (God), listen to your heart
and discerning spirit, so as to be able to discern when to help a stranger or
not.
 |
| Helping a Stranger |
If you discover strange behaviors from a stranger, it’s advised that you
distance yourself from the stranger to avoid being hurt. Watch the stranger
closely, starting from the way he/she talk and walk, to dressing, to body
language, body stature or structure, to eye movements, to utterances made and
the tone in which it’s made.
Check the situation at hand, is it a casualty, the
time and location of meeting the stranger, is it very or fairy convenient for
you? Ask the stranger few questions that can help ascertain identity. But in
all you do, render help if it’s of great necessity.
“The smallest deed is better than the greatest intention.”
– John Burroughs
And when you have assessed the individual and felt
convinced enough to help, but you get disappointed at the end of the day, as a
result of the occurrence of help-abuse after helping, do not be weary but instead
count it all joy that you were able to help with the resources God has given to
you. Forever, he that gives will be blessed, that’s a natural law on earth. See
yourself as a strong personality, who have a heart full of love, with a
listening ear ready to listen and with a hand willing to help others.
Help abuse can be eradicated from our dear society, if
people are willing to change their behavior and have the fear of God, love one
another, show appreciation and kindness, avoid gossips and side talks, strive
to build a clear conscience always, be accommodating, never neglecting the people
who helped out, and living in harmony with one another etc.
Conclusion
Do not give up on helping people, because God never gave
up on helping you. The humans you see every day are the ones, God uses in
granting help. However, help people when you know they can’t help you back. Caring
people help others not because they expect a reward but because it is natural
to show kindness. Show kindness by helping out whenever you can, even in the
face of recurrent help-abuse.
In all you do, still apply wisdom and precaution.
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